My Neighbor Died

While something like this usually wouldn’t make the blog, this one will.  I was working when I got the email from my other neighbor about JCo.  Since I live in a community of only 9 houses, we all know each other.  He and his wife used to be my direct neighbors, and they were awesome!  They would watch my house when I was gone.  They would help me with changing a light or carrying heavy things into the house.  He was such a sweet man. Until…the economic downturn.  The past 5 years haven’t’ been good to him or his attitude.  About 2 years ago, he allowed his house (that they lived in for over 20 years) to go into foreclosure and lied to all of us saying that they had bought a 3 bedroom across the way from me.  Why would any of us question them, they truly had been the back bone of our town home association for at least 10 years.  When confronted about the foreclosure, he got defensive and started spewing hatred, venom and anger about the government and racial slurs about immigrants and so on and so forth. 

When the new owners of that town home took possession of it, he called the cops saying that people were trying to break in and that people were trespassing!  Not only that, he has harassed the new, new owners ever since they moved in.  I tried to talk to him about it several months ago, but got no where—he was filled with hate and so much rage, I didn’t know how to even respond. 

More recently, another owner (who rents out her house) was staying with them.  She has always defended them and has been friends with them for at least 20 years.  She was one of their last advocates at the association.  After a series of events, he physically assaulted her and threw all of her stuff into the street.  She called the police and had a restraining order against him.

So, why did I write all of this?  His death, to me, is so sad.  He seemed to be a peaceful, happily married, close to retirement guy—for the 8.5 years before the economy sucked.  He was always willing to help someone. He was always willing to be a great neighbor.  And he died filled with hate, anger, bitterness, and unpleasantness.  Even his friends, who he and his wife had spent years hanging out with, had to quit being his friend because he was so angry ALL THE TIME! 

It’s a lesson for me—don’t allow the situations and circumstances of life create a hatred in you that becomes so blinding that you alienate the people who love you.  Don’t allow life to beat you down and take away the joy in your soul.  Don’t focus on the negative.  Negative things come, but wow—don’t let it kill you!